Embracing the Journey: The 3 G's of Our Goals

Let’s talk about them!

Having goals is hard. And although it is one of the best parts about being a person in today's time with the abundant resources we have at our fingertips, it is also extremely challenging. We are told to dream big as children, but eventually, those big goals we all desire are either shut down from their unrealistic requirements, or we pursue them, and then the pressure of the goal is more damaging than rewarding.

When we accomplish them, they are fun, fulfilling, and motivational. But it’s okay to admit that the process of goal achievement can also, at times, suck.

So let’s talk honestly about our goals and the 3 G’s that come with every single one.

Grind:

The go-to for motivation-seeking, goal-acquiring, and all-amazing superhuman is grind baby! Every time an individual on this planet sparks an idea in their head and adopts the courage to begin a challenging journey, they most often jump to the internet. Either at the very beginning or a little bit later down the road, we find ourselves seeking motivation for how to really plunge into and work towards what we want. And no matter what the source and search, we stumble upon plenty of content to which the very accomplished and successful person will say that you need ‘Grind.’

And yes, it’s true, you do. Unless you are a very lucky individual that gets their dream first go, then, well...that’s just an outlier. But we all know what I'm talking about, right?

The all-jacked-up dude feast of a podcast show that makes videos for TikTok and Instagram saying some version of ‘to win, you need to grind grind grind.’ And their cherry on top is that you need to stop complaining and being a loser. They are extremely tense and have the right idea but are a little too close to the line of fear tactics.

Or the out-of-touch CEO who says in their TedTalk that ‘yes, you can! Be...just like me…. just climb that corporate ladder’ because, you know…no way they continue to benefit from that advice. I mean, hey, if you want to climb that corporate ladder to be a CEO, CFO, or COO, then cool, go for it and listen to that advice. Your grind will then actually be climbing the ladder.

But most often, as you can tell, the advice for grinding is diminishing and daunting when you have a goal in mind. The fear of rejection, failure, and others takes us to extreme self-doubt.

Honestly, all of those people making those videos and sharing their knowledge are not wrong. You need to find the grind, but you need to find it for you and by you. Understand that some ideas, goals, or dreams fizzle out, and that’s okay. We shouldn’t beat ourselves up for wanting something for ourselves. I like to live in a mindset of opening every door because at least I was never left with a ‘what if.’ The experience from each goal I have had, failed or successful, has a place in my heart for who I was at that time. I think it’s pretty cool to look at old ideas; at least, we can say we have always been trying.

And eventually, one or some of those goals really do stick; we find the motivation, thoughts, and care that naturally push us to new areas. So we then glide into the next phase.

Grit:

Then we enter into the second G of our GGGGoals– Grit. Grind and Grit are comparable; often, we use both interchangeably. But Grit is after, as grind is a state in which you have accomplished a flow.

Sometimes we set a goal for ourselves, and it fails, then we go into this self-loathing attitude of internal bullying, saying we will never accomplish anything. To that, I would say once again, change your mindset to believing it’s pretty cool you tried something. If you are going to bully yourself for trying and failing, then switch those gears and force yourself into altering your attitude and the way you talk to yourself first. You can’t be your own enemy, and it pulls you down the wrong path.

“Nothing comes to full blossom before its time. Trying to force your art, or having it forced by the relentless demands of success, can often cause the blossoming to be false and fragile and less than it ultimately could be”

-Kent Nerburn

When you do reach the state in which the goal is one you stick to and are consistently motivated for, it becomes a passion project, and you intrinsically act on it every day. That is when you have found your grind and evolved into a state of flow.

Grit is where you use that flow and allow the failures to be nothing but bumps in the road that steer you in a direction that still leads to goal endurance. Grit is learning the steel attitude of ‘I'm going to do this no matter what.’ As well as the acceptance of transformation in the process, being able to mold yourself into whatever direction it takes.

It’s okay that you discover something months or years in, and you have to shift what you were doing– I actually think that’s the whole point! Learning along the way that the method of achievement demands imperative comfortability in change. It’s frustrating at the moment, and provide yourself the time to be annoyed about it, but eventually, it will be looked at as just a part of the process.

Gratitude:

Once you achieve that flow from the passion project and then alter your mind to withstand the confusing process of change, that is when gratitude can take its deserved place. The third G is the most rewarding part of any goal process.

Grind and Grit are still both rewarding as the manifold and generous lessons they teach hold honorable significance. But gratitude is when we are able to find the smiles and joy of thinking, ‘I just did that.’ And not necessarily from even accomplishing the main goal-- it could be from one of the more miniature moments. It is the gratitude you give yourself for being in flow and tackling the bumps. Being able to laugh at some inconvenience that is in your way and trusting yourself to not only push through but also be thankful for the lesson that will be gained.

I know it seems silly and farfetched. I remember starting this writing journey, often feeling overwhelmed and thinking to myself that a lot of these ideas I'm preaching are just a phony facade portrayed by successful people to push their own content.

I attended a virtual conference from the Nonfiction Association to learn the ins and outs of the publishing process. After months of writing, staying in on the weekends, and pushing myself to be in the dedication process of goal achievement, I got hit with a difficult reality check. I had to rethink and ditch most of what I convinced myself was the right way of achieving my goals.

After I processed the three days of information, I allowed myself an hour of being hindered. I laid down on my yoga mat outside, watched the clouds, and cried. And a younger version of myself could've easily let that crying go on for hours which then would've led me down that self-loathing path ultimately to my own failure. I used to believe that goals were only deemed successful by external praise and, well, money. However, it only lasted an hour because I did, in fact, start laughing. And that laughter was because it kind of felt right-- it was becoming my lesson of grit. And after that crying, I quickly started thinking of ideas to shift.

You see, I wasn’t actually upset or discouraged, I was too far into my flow. I understood I needed to grieve and move on from my assumptions to be able to continue the pursuit.

Lo and behold, a few weeks later, again staring at the clouds and starting the journey of this blog, I felt nothing but thankful for not only wanting but also working with adaptability. I felt pride. And feeling pride from yourself in yourself for working towards a goal is a feeling that is almost indescribable– it’s a combination of feeling transcended and consumed with appreciation.

An indescribable dazzling moment that is for yourself by yourself.

That is the third G of a GGGGoal. And there is nothing more human than being in a process of a goal. I still haven’t achieved my primary goal, but the three G’s of this GGGoal have made me understand the best part of being a human on this planet, which is trying.

It is true that we live in a world where resources are anywhere and everywhere. When thought about, especially in concern with one's plans, it is an intense concept to withstand. That’s why sometimes shit will fail, and we feel as if the universe, God, or the people around us want to see us fail. But no one and nothing is; that’s just because this is an overwhelming society, and the 3 G’s of ANY goal, big or small, is frustrating.

If you genuinely desire your Goal, you'll find your Grind, Grit, and Gratitude.

“It takes a long time to bring excellence to maturity.”

-Publilius Syrus

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